What My Heart is Made Of...: Alone

This morning, at 6:40 am, my heart was pulled from my chest, faded into the security line at the airport, and left me on a plane bound for New York... Scott and the girls headed up to see some family for FIVE days!!! A couple of weeks ago he came up with the idea and I had told him I wasn't ready for him to take the girls away from me overnight. We "discussed" it for a few days and I ended up agreeing, but not happy about it. As the couple of weeks went by, I realized that I will be extremely busy this week at work, so busy that the company is paying for local employees to stay in the hotel near the office. If Scott had stayed, I wouldn't have stayed in the hotel, but I still would have been working enough that I wouldn't be home each night until the girls were in bed. I would have felt bad to give him a hard time and made him stay and then not even be here!
As I watched Scott and my mom carry the girls away through the line and into the terminal, I started to panic a little. What if something goes wrong? What if they (well, just Taylor) cry for me? What if something happens and I couldn't get to them? Or I wouldn't see them again? I kept trying to push those thoughts out of my mind, but I'm sure it's typical of a mother's emotional mind! Scott was kind enough to call me at each leg of the trip to tell me how it was going. The girls were great on both flights, didn't cry, took naps, and enjoyed the sights. Now I'll just have to wait to freak out for their flight back. My mom was here the past week and helped him fly back.

Three Generations, on Noodle's last day of her visit.

I have to go off on a tangent here to point out something that I do not point out enough. This man of mine is simply amazing as a Father. He has been my Right hand from the very beginning and looked forward to taking over care when I went back to work. Since then he hasn't looked back, blinked an eye, or gotten frustrated in the least. He takes care of our daughters like that is what he was born to do and now he takes them on a trip on his own, with not a second thought. I really don't know of many men who could or would be willing to do this, even with just one baby! I do get so envious of him sometimes and feel like I'm missing out on the simple day to day things and wish I was the one doing it, but at the same time, I feel so incredibly lucky to have such a strong, secure, and confident partner as a parent. I am SO SO SO lucky to have found him and call him MINE!!!

Ok, back to being alone! Up to this point, my post has given my emotions of being away from my children for the first time. Well, the first time for a few days. This past week I had to go to Charlotte, NC for a night and was away overnight, but I didn't leave until 2pm and saw them up to then, was at dinner until 10pm anyway and then was back home before 6pm the next day. So, it wasn't that big of a deal.
So, as I mentioned earlier, their flight left at 6:40 am this morning. I was back home from dropping them off by then and was not going back to bed. By 9am, I had deep cleaned the kitchen, vacuumed the whole first floor of the house and mopped the kitchen. I took a quick break to have some cereal and then got back to it by picking up all the toys in the living room and rearranging the furniture! This brought me to about 11:00. I watched some TV and had lunch super early, then headed out for a couple of errands. That was a complete waste of time because I was going to get formula, wine, coffee K-Cups and dog food at BJ's. Well, they don't have my dog food anymore, the apparently don't sell alcohol on Sunday (I thought GA changed that??) and they will not match their Internet price for the baby formula!! I got so frustrated at the register that I just had them cancel my order and walked out. I guess I should have at least gotten my coffee! But, I won't be home all week so I won't need it until next weekend anyway, at which point, Scott's mom will be here and maybe she can help me talk some sense into them! She's helping Scott fly back with the girls on Thursday. I did make up for that frustration by going to Gymboree and getting THE cutest clothes for my girls at discounts of 75% off! Once I got home from that outing, I then vacuumed, cleared out, and Armor All'd both of our vehicles for two hours!! I'm now watching some TV, eating some dinner, and writing this blog. In a few minutes, I'll head upstairs to put all the laundry away, clean up our room, organize the girls' room and pack my bags for my big trip to stay in the city!
WOW...I honestly don't believe I've ever been this productive in my entire life!!!! This day has made me realize a few things:

I really wasted A LOT of time before I had kids!
A full day of no distractions from babies and husband makes for a very productive girl.
I definitely need days like this more often! NOT 5 days at a time, but a day here and there for sure.
I don't know how I will go 5 days without kissing those cute little faces...but,
this has really been a great day!

At first I was glad to be working so much while they're gone so I wouldn't dwell over not seeing them, but now I wish I was going to be home all week to spend some time ALONE!
Thanks for reading! Here are some pics from the last few days.